Hands Off, Inc

"We are a community made up of people determine to intercede for Commercially Sexually Exploited Children and young women, through training, raising awareness, and safe dwelling. "


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Dangerous Words!!!

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I remember growing up how family and friends were quick to label me. The fact that they couldn’t easily understand me, in their mind it was a ticket to define what their limited perception allowed. I grew up thinking of myself in a way that I shouldn’t those voices that name called echoed in silent places. The voices that tried to stop me from my destiny rang loud every time I tried to take a step forward, but they pulled me back.

Parents we must bridle our tongue when we are angered with our young people. WE must be careful not to call them “stupid, silly, loose, shy, fat, ridiculous and much more. The name we call them are seeds, they are seeds that take root over the years. They will hear your voice no matter how many “I’m sorry” you sing. Words are powerful that’s why God says life and death are in the power of our tongues. Mom and dad you have the power to speak life and blessings over your youth. Of course they will do the dumbest things on earth and they will make some absolutely horrendous decisions, but we have to be patient.

Be careful!!!  one wrong word of hurt or your disappointment in them, can push them to a place you won’t be able to save them from. They maybe going through so much more than they can speak, they are probably making poor choices because of peer pressure. The worst thing you can do is push them away by the things you say. Tough love means making hard decisions which is the betterment for their future, not speaking to them in a degrading or insulting manner.

When you feel your temperature rising,  your blood is boiling and that one nerve you had left jumps off the cliff… breathe…. Inhale and exhale. Calm down get your words together and don’t allow your anger or disappointment to lead you in throwing up words you can’t eat.

“Don’t give them a label that doesn’t belong to them”


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Too Young to Date

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When I look at this photo I become afraid for our youth, I become worried about this upcoming generation, I think about all the teen pregnancies and insufficient care for the babies, the diseases with no cures. This picture makes me question “where on earth are their parents”?. Guess what? the most troubling thing is the parents allowed it! Yes I said “allowed it”. Way too frequently you see these adolescent ‘hook ups’. Parents are allowing their daughters, baby teens (13, 14,15,16) to have boyfriends… EXCUSE ME???. Have you lost your natural mind? When did it become ok at such a young age to give this type of responsibility to a child? My fellow parents when you open the “dating door” You must understand that the door can never be closed again, and a lot of things and situations are about to enter though that door.

Let me guess “everybody is doing it”? you got to together with your ‘moms group’ and you all agreed it was ok’ now you take tuns with the foolishness of dropping off and picking up your baby!  WAKE UP…Raising a teen is hard enough but when you throw your precious daughter to the wolves you better be ready for what is coming home with her. Peer pressure is real! mom you know, you allowed your baby teen to talk you into having a boyfriend. Who is the parent you are the child? Stop trying to be friends. They don’t want to be your friend! that’s just an excuse they use to manipulate you. And please don’t say they will do it anyway, because a 13-16 girl should not have any say what so ever about what she will do and not do. We are the parents we enforce the rules, we are supposed to protect our daughters, we should be teaching them self-respect and high moral standards, and the importance of higher education.

When you open the dating door at such a tender age it is DANGEROUS. Your daughter may get all A’s, cleans her room, she may be very respectful and responsible. But hear me when I tell you she is NOT ready to date. Her precious mind is marred when she dates, she now has to live up to the girlfriend status, she now becomes more conscious of her appearance which leads to self-esteem issues, she is now reading adult magazines on dating, social media is blowing her mind with images and thoughts, she now becomes a high risk for teen pregnancy, that one kiss can turn her healthy life upside down with diseases, she is now facing the green-eyed demon called jealousy, and the list goes on.. Mom dad, your daughter is precious you must protect her and not give her up to a life she is not ready for. Her education and mental stability is crucial to her healthy growth. Once you open the “dating door” there is an attitude that comes with it, and you must be willing to hold yourself accountable.

“Pet a dog you don’t know, and it may bite you”

 


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Mom Dad Please Listen To Me

473217_10201134506109855_801365329_o-1“Mom, dad you’re not listening to me” ..”You don’t get it”… “You don’t understand me”.. “things are not the same as when you were younger”. Do these phrases sound familiar? Yep I’m sure they do. This is the sound of every beckoning cry when you’re talking with your teenager “you just don’t understand me you never let me talk”. Guess what parents, in most cases they are right. This day and age is not the same as your youthful days. Nowadays we have social media galore, this is the age of information at your finger tips, microwave solutions, fake it till you make mantras, peer pressure and so much more. Designers now make young women’s clothes as if there is a shortage on fabric, times have changed mom and dad. Mom dad, it’s time to listen to what your young person is trying to communicate. This generation wants and needs to be heard, listen with the intent to understand not respond. Take your teen to a sit down dinner, just get somewhere quiet and comfortable. Open the lines of communication not a dictatorship because they will not respond to you, they will shut down and rebel harder and longer. Allow them to express themselves (respectfully of course) without feeling they have no identity or common sense. There are gifts and talents in your young person that you may or may not recognize. Those gifts and talents need to be nurtured, encouraged and protected, even if you don’t understand their choices it’s their choice. Help them blossom into their God-given talents by loosening the chains and listening to what they have to say. Surprisingly enough they are much more receptive when they feel they have a voice.